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| Dear Chassidim (wherever you are hiding) |
 I am happy to welcome you to the ranks of Rechnitzer Chassidus.
Not everyone enjoys such status, but this comes with a responsibility, too. This responsibility is both moral and fiscal.
You know we are desperately in need of funds, so we can purchase more Armani suits. Your generous contribution will suit
us fine.
I am sure that you must know at least 9 other like-minded people
(otherwise how could you daven). Rechnitz gives a new meaning to the
term - collect calls.
Behind Rechnitz there is a message. It is not meant to offend, but
it is intended to raise issues and highlight paradoxes in today's
Jewish world.
Please take this circular as a personal invitation to attend our
annual fundraiser. You need not attend nor send a check. Putting
lots of cash in our pushka will suffice. Due to the poor economy, we
are forced to downsize your money
Please disregard all allegations made by my archrival, -The Farfale
Rov. It has not affected my ability to render minor decisions.
To join our dwindling ranks of Rechnitzer Chassidim, the fastest
growing dynasty in the history of Iowa,: E-mail to
rechnitzerrebbe@yahoo.com
A website will be coming soon.
You may register as a fully-fledged Rechnitzer Chossid. Thus, you
will be recognized immediately by our meshulochim, worldwide, when
they appear on your doorstep. Remember, when it comes to Rechnitz….Buy
For Now
The Rechnitzer Rebbe |
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